It's been close to two weeks since I wrote - it's been a very busy time here, what with moving, the divorce, school, the kids' schedules. Life has bordered on hectic but it's been a different kind of hectic. The drama has lessened considerably since we've moved. I have actually taken the night off from my Medical Office Procedures Class to do the trick or treat thing with my daughter, my girlfriends and their kids. We had a ball - four kids with six adults trailing along! Too funny!
I've been studying hard too. My pharmacology mid year was a 92! I was shocked to say the least! The only down side is that I OD'd an 11 month old baby on paper with Dilantin. Oh ya I used the wrong formula all right! Poor kid should have gotten a dose of 7.8 mg, not 47.8!! OMG I had to explain myself in class this morning! Glad it was on paper though and not reality!
Tomorrow is Phlebotomy and I've studied as much of that as I can. Thursday is the dreaded A&P Exam II, which I have studied but will NOT stay in my head! In fact, I'm going to search out the on line tutor momentarily to see if there's some way to make sure all this stuff stays in my head! One would think I would have it memorized since this is my second time through the class!
Nursing school applications are being accepted starting tomorrow! Yes, I have mine filled out and ready to rock! I just hope I get one of the 100 spots (actually there are 60 night slots and 40 day slots). I think I'm in the position to take whatever spot I get! I also have no clue what I will do if I don't get in this time. I know last semester there were people that had A's and didn't get in! No one in API got in last year at all and there were 16 of us applying. NOT ONE got accepted. Maybe the selection committee will take pity on my old age and let me in. I'll be a good nurse, I'm sure of it most days. I know I'm capable of working hard enough; I worry I won't be smart enough to handle nursing school. Keep the fingers crossed and keep the prayers flowing.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Closing an Old Book ... Opening a New One
Today my divorce was granted. It's a mixed day; I've wavered from being very happy that the whole process is finally over to crying over 22 years done in the bang of a gavel. Yes, I started this process and I'm glad it's over but it's still sad that no matter what I tried to do to fix things, this was something I just couldn't fix.
I'm happiest that I have custody of all three children - I'm glad they all decided in the end to move in with me. This house, while little, is working out quite well. The kids have adjusted their schedules ever so slightly. My daughter is in an after school program so she's busy two days per week at school; my sons did not have to change their bus routes so they're happy. The dog is even thrilled with his new back yard where he can run loose and bark his little fool head off. This is what I've wanted for the last I don't know how many years - why does it seem so damned lonesome? It's not for lack of company - because there are certainly enough people in this house at any given time for me to chat with...I guess it's because for all these years, in bad and good, there was someone there just for me - even though he wasn't there for me much these past eight years or so. He's locked in his own world right now and that's fine with me. There wasn't room in it for me anyhow.
So tonight I open a new book - my life as a single mother. Strange to see it written out. I've also received my first piece of mail addressed as "Ms" and not "Mrs." It looks funny but I'll get used to it.
I'm happiest that I have custody of all three children - I'm glad they all decided in the end to move in with me. This house, while little, is working out quite well. The kids have adjusted their schedules ever so slightly. My daughter is in an after school program so she's busy two days per week at school; my sons did not have to change their bus routes so they're happy. The dog is even thrilled with his new back yard where he can run loose and bark his little fool head off. This is what I've wanted for the last I don't know how many years - why does it seem so damned lonesome? It's not for lack of company - because there are certainly enough people in this house at any given time for me to chat with...I guess it's because for all these years, in bad and good, there was someone there just for me - even though he wasn't there for me much these past eight years or so. He's locked in his own world right now and that's fine with me. There wasn't room in it for me anyhow.
So tonight I open a new book - my life as a single mother. Strange to see it written out. I've also received my first piece of mail addressed as "Ms" and not "Mrs." It looks funny but I'll get used to it.
Friday, October 06, 2006
A New Chapter
Today I'm starting a new chapter in the world of Twinkielight. I am finally moving into my own house! All week, I have slowly been moving things to my new home across town with a tremendous amount of help from my daughter. Together we have moved a lot of our accumulate things into this house. Today we are scheduled to move two dressers and three beds, plus our clothes. The goal is to sleep in the new house tonight. Let's see if we'll get there!
She and I both have the day off from work/school so we have no time limits. Right now she's watching tv and I'm taking a blog-break. I have a court date in five days to finalize the divorce and it's a good thing to be moving. The tension here is too thick for me to deal with on top of work and school. I had to get out so I took a gigantic leap of faith and signed a one year lease on a small, three bedroom home with a large fence in yard across town. The kids don't have to change schools and I live about a breath away from my job. It's going to be a good thing. The best part is that all three of my children are coming with me! I was nervous because my middle son was going to stay with his dad but in the end he's decided to come with me. I'm happy that he's made the decision on his own; I couldn't make it for him because he's old enough to make that kind of decision on his own. I'm just glad he's coming! It wouldn't have felt right without him...kind of like having an arm cut off and feeling the phantom pains. Just wouldn't be right.
She and I both have the day off from work/school so we have no time limits. Right now she's watching tv and I'm taking a blog-break. I have a court date in five days to finalize the divorce and it's a good thing to be moving. The tension here is too thick for me to deal with on top of work and school. I had to get out so I took a gigantic leap of faith and signed a one year lease on a small, three bedroom home with a large fence in yard across town. The kids don't have to change schools and I live about a breath away from my job. It's going to be a good thing. The best part is that all three of my children are coming with me! I was nervous because my middle son was going to stay with his dad but in the end he's decided to come with me. I'm happy that he's made the decision on his own; I couldn't make it for him because he's old enough to make that kind of decision on his own. I'm just glad he's coming! It wouldn't have felt right without him...kind of like having an arm cut off and feeling the phantom pains. Just wouldn't be right.
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